Persuasion & Manipulation
it doesn’t matter if it’s in your personal life or your professional life at one point or another, you’re, probably going to deal with someone who’s trying to manipulate you now.
Importance of Understanding the Difference:
The first thing that we want to understand is that there’s a difference between persuasion and manipulation, and it comes down to the intent for persuasion. The other person is trying to get you to do something that will possibly benefit you in your life and for manipulation.
The person is trying to get you to do something that will possibly harm you in your life. That’s the biggest difference, so it doesn’t matter if it’s in your personal or professional life there are going to be different ways that people try to manipulate you, and what we got to understand is that not all manipulation is done in the same way.
A guilt trip is a form of manipulation where you made a mistake, and the other person forgives you but later on, in the interaction they’re constantly bringing it up whenever something is going off. They’ll bring up that fault of yours in the past and this predominantly happens in relationships, but it’s something that can also happen in your work.
For example, let’s say you have a mean boss, you know those traditional mean bosses that you see in sitcoms the first time they may forgive you for making a huge blunder. But let’s say you’re in the company for some time and you’re asking for some sort of promotion or a bonus, they may bring up that blunder that they so quickly forgave you for later in the game to ensure that you don’t get that promotion.
This is a form of manipulation. Another one is the rationalizer. The rationalizer will do an error, but then they will intellectually break down. Why they did the error. Let me give you an example. Imagine someone rear-ends you and you get out of the car you’re about to ask this person for their information, but that’s when they’re like look, I know I rear-ended you but here’s why I’m having such and such bad day and if you’re, someone that is compassionate, you Won’t sue me, you won’t even ask me for my insurance information, because I’m having this much of a bad day, and if you can’t empathize with me for having this much of a bad day, then what does this make you in some ways? They’re rationalizing it, even though it doesn’t make logical sense from their worldview, it makes a lot of logical sense.
So that’s how they’re going to try to guilt-trip you into doing something that you don’t want to do. Okay, so this is the rationalizer. The third one is the seducer. This is the person that could bust out flirty or seductive moves to get you to do a certain act and there’s a funny story about this. So, for the Armani talks brand, I offer a consultation service and package for people that are trying to improve their public speaking skills improve their writing skills and I ended up getting this free consultation application from this one individual who’s doing very well for himself and He’s at that stage where he has control over the company’s checkbook he’s going to these different events, meeting a lot of different people and he was like with guys he can speak well.
He can speak in a powerful tone, but what happens is that, since he’s in such high power, his rival competitors are sending attractive women into the same networking events as him trying to manipulate money out of him and his checkbook, and he was wondering if I Could help him with that? I was like bro I would love to, but unfortunately, I predominantly focus on communication skills for professional reasons, not seduction, but in his scenario, he was proving that people can use seduction to get you to do something that later on. You’re going to regret – and this is something that you got to look out for, especially as you’re rising in a field – the fourth one is the confused person. This is one of the hardest ones to spot because you never know about their intent. Is this person malicious, or is this person just a dummy? You may not be able to know in the beginning stages, especially when you’re meeting someone for the first time. let’s say someone was breaking into your car, but they looked like a person that wouldn’t rob you they’re wearing a suit they’re looking posh, but somehow, they have the technical knowledge to unlock your car and they’re in your car and you’re like yo man. Are you trying to steal my car and they’re like oh? No, I have the same car and they’re so good with their words that they’re making you think that they’re confused. This is one of those situations where you could be like all right.
Man, I mean. I’m not a dummy. I could tell that you were trying to break into my car but in the real world. Not all scenarios are that evident a lot of the time this person is going to do something wrong and then they’re going to be like. I didn’t know any better, and this one is up to you. You got to use your judgment; call to realize what should i do. The unfortunate news is plenty of times you will be wrong, but the process of being wrong is how judgment is built. The fifth one is the same artist. This is also known as a virtue. Signalers they’ll see that you have a certain philosophy, a certain principle and then they’re going to try to shoot it down. I had this one time a couple of years back where there was this girl that was talking all anti-capitalist stuff she’s, like oh those capitalists, they’re such bad people. This was a time when I was starting my businesses as well, so when she was talking like that, I didn’t appreciate that and she knew that I was the capitalist. That’s why she was over here. Talking extra reckless and she was like you know, capitalists have no moral sense. She was saying this with her fancy iPhone with her fancy car. Do you know who popularized the car, your boy, henry ford, henry ford, was a hardcore capitalist. You know a lot of these shows that you watch traced back to the root cause of it tons of capitalists, thought of the idea that provided the jobs for it to happen and you’re over here saying that capitalists don’t have moral value, some don’t that doesn’t mean That all of us don’t so as I’m getting shamed, I’m doing some shaming back.
I am perfect, but this is another way to do manipulation. If you can hit someone with the right shaming. That makes them second guess themselves. Then it’s easier to plant a new thought wave into their mind. Six is the liar, but not really. This is the group of people. That’ll leaves some information out. They’ll tell you some information, but they’ll leave a lot of it out. So let’s say you’re a parent and you tell your kids, they make sure. After your curfew, you don’t sneak out the door, okay, but they sneak out, but they sneak out through the window. Then, the next morning you ask them: hey: did you sneak out yesterday and they’re like no mom and dad? I didn’t sneak out through the door, see they’re there, leaving some information out that can help.
Persuasion & Manipulation
You understand what is going on and give you an understanding of the context and here’s the thing mainstream. Media is often like that. They’ll give you certain pieces of information and then the masses will be like okay.
This is all that there is, but in reality, that’s rarely. In this case, they’ll give you some information that suits a narrative, and this is how a lot of people get manipulated. Seven is the gas lighter. I made a detailed video about this and I’ll link it right on here and in the description box.
I have a different view of the gas lighter traditionally, whenever people think of gas lighting, they think of giving someone attention and then taking it away. My perspective is more in regards to basketball.
Have you ever watched basketball before you ever saw that one move called the crossover? If you haven’t, this is when you have the ball, and you lean one way to make your opponent think that you’re going this way, and then suddenly, you switch to a different angle to confuse this person.
This is what gas sliding is in a nutshell, and if you could view gaslighting like this you’ll see that people that you consider friends, people that you consider reliable sources, often gaslight a lot of marketing departments.
Gaslight, you they’ll, have you thinking a certain way? They’ll fill you up with fear rage, they’ll make you scared and then they’ll be like, but this is the solution. So, if you view it from the angle of crossovers, you’ll see that gas lighting is all around you and some of the time you have to deal with it.
It’s so ingrained in the culture, where you don’t want to throw a fuss about every single time that you’re gaslighted, but other times you got ta, throw a fuss about it. Eight, and this is what I call the distractor.
This is the person, if you see them doing something malicious, you call them out on it. They’ll find a way to be like oh look, a bird they’ll get you focusing on that bird. Then, when you come back, you’re like what was I talking about again distraction is powerful because most people can’t control their minds.
I mean most people can’t focus for more than five-six seconds before they have another thought. Wave and manipulative people understand this. They understand, if they’re, getting confronted for poor behavior, that if they plant a different thought in the other person’s mind, especially a thought filled with charge, then this other person is going to be focusing more on that versus the confrontation.
So, this is another manipulation tactic. Nine. This is so innocent. Have you ever met that person that looks innocent? I mean you, look at this person and you’re like that. This person won’t do anyone any harm, sweet face, tiny looks gentle, they say stuff like wherever I go drama always follows me: I’m not a big fan of drama either, and the question is: why is it consistently following you, then you start to go deeper and deeper into it, and you start to see that they’re often the root cause of the drama, and when you see a person like this, you want to be aware, because what happens? A lot of the times with us is that when we see a lot of people ganging up on one person, we want to be the rare few.
That’s like! Oh! No! No, I’m with this person, and here’s. Why? But if they’re starting drama with all these other people, it’s just a matter of time until they start drama with you, so just because they have a pretty sweet face, doesn’t mean that their intent is pure and the final one is anger.
When people get angry, it’s easy to want to switch the topic, and some people understand this, where they’ll get angry, often at strategic times, which means that you know. Normally, when you’re picturing an angry person, you probably think that they wake up frustrated.
They brush their teeth, frustrated, and they watch tv frustrated, but that’s not how it works. They have regular lives like most people, but they strategically bring out this anger to scare people and manipulate so this type of angry person is way different than a person with just a simple temper.
Tantrums who are normally angry. This manipulative person normally is calm, but suddenly can get angry strategically out of nowhere. So these are the 10 traits regarding manipulation that you want to look out for, for it doesn’t matter who you are you’re, going to run into groups of people like this now and then, whether you’re, rising in a field, whether you’re going vertical or horizontal in The field doesn’t matter you’re going to run into these people and how you react to them are is going to depend upon the way that they’re, manipulating you, okay, if you learned a thing or two from today’s video, and you want to learn more, be sure to follow me on Twitter.
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